WHO YOU ARE: A Message To All Women [Video]

Happy FriYAY!

All week, I have stumbled upon blessing after blessing. It’s like God’s little winks letting us know we are on the right track. I just love how He does that! I call it living in “flow”.  This morning someone sent me this AHHHHH-mazing video and of course, I had to share it with all of you. As a confidence builder, affirmation addict (hence, #Tiffirmations) and advocate for empowering women to live their most authentic life– this video gave me chills, brought tears to my eyes and fueled me up for the day ahead. Please do yourself a favor and watch it, but not only watch it allow the message to sink down into your spirit.

 

 

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P.S. Will I see you at Stix & Brix on March 25th? I hope so! There’s still a few tickets available HERE!

DO YOU HAVE PMS? [repost]

Hello Kindred Spirits!

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  • Have you been running on fumes?
  • What have you been chasing?  Money….A Guy….Your 2 Year Old….Your Dream….Your Tail?
  • Are you focused and living with purpose?  Or are you all over the place with little direction?

We’re wrapping up our first week in 2017. How are you feeling? I am clearing the clutter of life and getting focused on my PMS to make sure I am in alignment with it and making the right choices to support it.   You’re probably wondering “what the heck is Tiff talking about, right”?  Of course, I’m not talking about that dreaded week every month when all hell breaks loose, your skinny jeans fit a bit too snug and our head seems to be detached from our body- I’m talking about my PERSONAL MISSION STATEMENT!

DO YOU HAVE A PERSONAL MISSION STATEMENT?

We should all be able to clearly verbalize our PMS in one sentence.  Whether you are a stay-at-home mom dedicated to raising healthy children or you are climbing the corporate ladder or volunteering your time to a non-profit organization close to your heart- living our lives with intention and knowing, without a doubt, what our mission in life is- gives us purpose and keeps us from just meandering through life.  Our PMS keeps us focused, brings us joy and gives us the guidance we need on those days when we feel unsure! 

WE WERE ALL PUT ON THIS EARTH FOR A PURPOSE!

A personal mission consists of 3 parts:

  1. What do I want to do?
  2. Who do I want to help?
  3. What is the result? What value will I create?

 

Do you know your PMS?  Awesome!  Please share it with us with a comment below.

If not,  here’s  a fun exercise to help you open your heart and mind before attempting to write your PMS:

Sit in a comfortable, quiet space.  Close your eyes and clear your mind.  Imagine you are 90 years old- healthy, fulfilled and content- sitting in a porch swing with the sound of birds chirping and the wind rustling the trees.  You look back on your life and list all the miraculous things you did, places you visited and people you blessed by living FULLY IN YOUR PURPOSE.  Is there anything you regret not doing?   What were the things that mattered most to you over your lifetime?  When did you feel most alive?  What were you doing when you were effectively helping others?  Remember, this is not about how much money you earned in your life either!

Write all these things down.  At 90, our life is nearly over- that is if we actually make it to 90!   Do you want to be able to look back on it and know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you TRULY LIVED YOUR PURPOSE?   You may not be able to write your PMS just like that- SNAP- in one day.  Give yourself time and you may have to do some serious soul searching.

I am going to make this story short and sweet.  There is really A LOT more to it which I will share another time!  In 2002, after booking plenty of TV shows and building a decent resume as an actress and TV host, I sensed something was missing.  I had come to LA and achieved what I “thought” would make me happy and fulfilled.  It didn’t.  I knew God had more for me to do on this Earth and I had felt that from the time I was a little girl, but I wasn’t quite sure what it was.  I always knew I loved to help people, but “help people” is very broad.

In June 2002, with some money in the bank after wrapping a TV show,  I left LA and went back to Texas for six months of soul searching.   I am so grateful I had the luxury to do this.  After 3 months of getting “still” and pretty much locking myself away from all the things that had always distracted me before- I received TOTAL CLARITY on what my PURPOSE was and wrote out my PMS.  I tear up as I write this now because that was such a profound time in my life.   I knew that I was here to “Empower, Educate and Inspire women- through my testimony and experiences- to live their most confident, fulfilled and powerful lives”.

I spent 3 more months in Texas writing my first treatment for a women’s talk show and taped a pilot!   This was the most amazing 6 months.  I went on to film two women’s talk shows and eventually started my YouTube Channel. When we clear the clutter of life and get through the storms, follow the rainbow and look within at the beautiful loving nature’s God gave us all- we find our pot of gold!  We waste so much time looking everywhere else for the gold, but it’s within each of us.  Then when we share that gold with others- WE HAVE FOUND OUR PURPOSE!

 

“Writing or reviewing a mission statement changes you because it forces you to think through your priorities deeply, carefully, and to align your behaviour with your beliefs”

– Stephen Covey, ‘7 Habits of Highly Effective People’

We should all support one another on our mission in life.  Thank you for being part of mine!

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What Was Your 2016 Highlight?

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Hello Gorgeous!

Did Santa bring you what you asked for? I hope you all had a Christmas weekend filled with fun. Now, we are leading up to ((drum roll))……..the new year! As I’ve mentioned in previous posts, I try to take time out in December to reflect and begin planning for the new year. I caught myself constantly saying out loud “how hard the year was” and got sick of hearing my Negative Nellie taking over. I stopped myself and thought Yes, but it’s also been an amazing year of growth and preparation”. I began thinking of my 2016 highlights and blessings. WHOA! What an amazing year. This was so powerful I just had to write a blog post about it and encourage you all to do the same.

Ok, so one of my top highlights of 2016 was turning 45!  Ummm, yes– I was actually excited about it! Call me crazy. Specifically, the love fest luncheon my dear friend and spiritual mentor –Dr. Melanie Ross Mills– threw for me. It’s humbling to have so many beautiful (inside & out) friends unite for the sole reason of lifting you up. To give you a glimpse of the day…imagine walking into the most beautifully decorated dining room with a big round table so everyone could see one another. The table was set for princesses with orchids and gifts for everyone. The sunlight coming through the windows made the whole room even more “twinkly”. We wore pixie headbands and the champs was flowing. My bestie ordered the most extravagant and amazing cake complete with all my loves represented on it. Melanie said a beautiful prayer including a message to each guest. (talk about a kleenex moment!) She had each girlfriend prepare a sweet message for me which was made into a slide show. For someone who has struggled with “receiving”, I admit– this was a bit uncomfortable at first. But, I knew God was using these friends to pour love on me like a salve to heal my battle wounds from such a wild year. These women showed me the true meaning of “SISTERHOOD” in action.

Thank you Mel! I don’t know how your massive heart fits inside your tiny body!

It could not have been a more perfect afternoon! I will forever cherish that day and each beautiful friend in the photo above. At this time of celebration, reflection and anticipation of the new year, I encourage you to take a moment to think of the highlights of your year.  It’s been a challenging year for many of us and it’s easy to focus on the moments we felt defeated. Let’s focus on the wins!

 

 

I just read the following message about sisterhood by Claire Zammit, Ph.d and had to share it with you all:  

“Thank you. You stand for your own greatness and your commitment to supporting other women in realizing theirs will change and evolve our world.

I am so honored and grateful to walk side by side with you on this journey.

One of the other things I most want to appreciate today is the transformative power of sisterhood.

None of us can become ourselves by ourselves. (I looove that!)

We need to be mirrored, supported, challenged and championed by each other to come into the fullness of our power and to unleash our brilliance.

Let’s commit to this sisterhood.

Let’s go out of our way to support each other.

When we see a woman stepping up, let’s stand behind her.

When she stumbles, we can be there to help her up. 

When she is challenged, it’s up to us to fight for her.

And when she triumphs, we should celebrate her wildly.

I’m so incredibly grateful for the ways in which so many women in my life and this community have stood for me.”

I would love to hear what your 2016 highlight was. Please share and make a comment!

If you had a girlfriend(s) stand by your side this year please make sure to send them a note of gratitude and appreciation.

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P.S. You still have a few more days to book your coaching sessions with my BOGO offer which ends Dec 31st! If you book a session, you get a session. ($300 value for $150) Don’t miss this opportunity to invest in yourself. I’ve been working with some amazing women over the past few weeks who took advantage of this offer. Iron sharpens iron and it’s powerful seeing the a-ha moments, shifts and confidence growing in their eyes! 

Sessions must be used by March 31, 2017.  Skype sessions available for out of towners.

SIMPLY USE THIS SPECIAL PAYPAL LINK TO BOOK NOW >> https://www.paypal.me/TiffanyHendra/150

Let’s step into 2017 stronger together! 

I AM… A BIT BOSSY // New Video

Hello Gorgeous!

It has been an amazing, life changing, sometimes frustrating, work in progress to build my brand and Sanctuary Of Style. The tool that has helped me the most is video!  I crack up when I look back at some of the very first SOS videos and how green I was. But, dang it— I had drive and passion! With those two things, we can accomplish anything even when all the pieces aren’t in place and things aren’t perfect. I shot my first video on my phone without a light kit or fancy editing.  Now, I not only coach/mentor women, but I also get to teach people how to get started sharing their message on video! Regardless of your career or ministry, video is a wonderful way for people to get to know you and your business.

With that said, I’m excited to finally have a new video sharing my mission: 

 

I would love to hear from you!

What have you learned on this journey with me?

Have you made lasting changes? Like what?

 

Did you get my FREE ebook? As a gift for joining the mailing list at TiffanyHendra.com, you will receive my ebook of 101 Affirmations and a list of “I Am’s”. I’m a firm believer in speaking powerful words over yourself on a daily basis.

You will be happy to know I am prepping the closet to film new videos! I know, I know…you girls have waited long enough! 

Love & Ladyballs,

Tiff 

Tiff’s 20 Tips To Being More Joyful TODAY!

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1. Cut the crap…keep it real.

2. You get what you give…you want respect, give respect.

3. Be a lifelong learner.

4. Be present..the past is o-v-e-r.

5. Be flexible & open minded.

6. Keep an attitude of gratitude.

7. Create a vision board…keep your goals & dreams in plain sight.

8. Words are powerful…be mindful of what you say.

9. Exercise & move your body.

10. Learn the power of saying NO.

11. Do the right thing & take the high road.

12. Giving & helping others is like a natural anti-depressant.

13. Always keep believing in yourself no matter the circumstance.

14. Practice self-love by not comparing yourself to others.

15. Ignore other people’s drama.  

16. Admire your strengths & embrace your weaknesses.

17. What you focus on expands so focus on the good & get more good.

18. Try to put yourself in the other person’s shoes. A different perspective is always a good thing.

19. Prayer is powerful and can be done anytime, anywhere~

20. NEVER GIVE UP!!!

 

 

Which of these do you need to focus on more?

Do whatever it takes to stretch, grow & expand.

Growth may bring temporary pain, but it will turn into a life of JOY!

Share these tips with any friends who could use the encouragement!

Shine & Strut,

Tiff

 

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P.S. Hey DFW Sistas, join us tonight Thurs, July 14th for a fun time of beauty demos and giveaways at Etre Belle in NorthPark Center.

 

WHATCHA SAYING TO YOURSELF? 3 Simple Steps To Positive Self Talk

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Hello Gorgeous!

That simple but powerful statement is today’s topic. A few days ago, I was sitting staring at this coffee cup and thinking how much I love to say this to my friends and I even open most of my SOS webisodes with it. I started wondering how many women actually say that to themselves.  I would bet it’s probably a terribly low percentile of about 10% and that’s on the high range.Think about it.

Do you ever look in the mirror and tell yourself you are gorgeous?

I admit, on most days I look in the mirror and focus on the sagging skin, circles under my eyes, that varicose vein that’s popping out on my leg and the list goes on. Sad this is how we start the day! That’s why I harp on positive affirmations so much. Our mental chatter goes on alllllllllllll day long! We are literally talking to ourselves all day every day. I’m not just referring to how we talk about our physical appearance either. We are either beating ourselves up for the past, feeling guilty about something we did today or have anxiety about the future. This is enough to keep you in a negative spiral 24/7. Who wants to live in freedom from the prison of your mind? ME! My hand is raised and this is what I try to practice every single day. Our minds are powerful and some days are harder than others. If we allow ourselves to spiral too long, we end up in a dark place that’s tough to get out of. I know! I battled depression for many years while I was hiding my secrets and self medicated with drugs. We all deserve to live in freedom. So, it’s up to us to change how we speak to ourselves. No one can do it for us.

Here are 3 simple steps I have found to stay above the dark zone: 

STEP 1: Acknowledgement. We have to take ownership and acknowledge that we’re thinking and saying negative things to ourselves.

STEP 2: Stop that crap. Don’t allow yourself to wallow and play that negative CD over and over in your head. Acknowledge it then stop the thought.

STEP 3: Replace. Once you stop yourself and that crappy thought you must immediately replace it with a positive one. I’ll give you an example of something I thought this morning. “I’m so lazy and feel chunky because I haven’t worked out in a week”… then replaced it with “Hey, I’m not lazy and have been working out hard all year and deserve a break for a few weeks. I’ll get back on the program next week. Enjoy some vacay time Tiff”. It’s all about seeing the positives instead of always focusing on the negatives. See how I turned a “beat myself up” thought into a positive one along with a praise for how hard I’ve worked out all year. We would say the same thing to our best friend. We extend grace to those we love all the time so why is it so difficult to give it to ourselves?

We can talk ourselves out of anything which will stall our goals and dreams. Positive self talk can change the entire direction of our life! This is why I’m a firm believer in using affirmations as a tool to stay on track. I have positive sayings, verses and quotes hanging all over my house.

If you are new to SOS and have not received my affirmations e-book, go to www.TiffanyHendra.com and join the mailing list. The book will come to your inbox for FREE! It’s a compilation for 101 of my favorite affirmations from my Sunday evening blog posts.

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GUESS WHAT?

I’m excited we are back in the sanctuary taping new videos!!! WooHoo!

Any topic you want to see? Comment and let me know. 

Love, Tiff

FREE YOURSELF: Share Your Secrets

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Hello Gorgeous!

This past Monday night, Access Hollywood aired my interview with Kit Hoover for the 3rd time. What a miracle! I know it’s God because that rarely happens. Kit Hoover has two daughters and she was so invested in my story. Proves that not all entertainment news is vapid nonsense.  Many of you who have been loyal SOS followers may have been shocked to hear the deeper story of my tumultuous past. Now you know the true meaning when I say “my mess has become my message” and why I am so passionate about enriching the lives of women. My mission is to provide resources of hope and inspiration like this blog and the YouTube ChannelBooks and more tools on vision and affirmations are next on the list! 

It’s not easy to reveal the gritty, ugly parts of yourself, but I do so bravely with the hope that other women will know they are not alone. Over the 5 year journey of SOS, I never felt God leading me to share my sexual assault story here with you all publicly. His timing is perfect. I probably wasn’t strong enough before to handle all the judgment and scrutiny that the media has put me under.

In my one-on-one mentoring, I have openly shared my story with women especially the teenage girls I have worked with. Several of them have been molested as little girls or raped in their teen years like I was. I do not want young women burying this and hiding secrets! Secrets are like poison to the spirit. I was raped at 16 and didn’t tell a single person until I was 31 years old. My entire existence in my 20’s was based in shame, fear and anger. I went from being the leader of my church youth group, head cheerleader, straight A student and overall confident girl to spiraling into alcohol, drugs, codependent relationships, promiscuity and mild eating disorders. Whatever I could do to either numb myself or abuse myself with destructive behavior – I tried it.

THEN THERE WAS GOD!

I believe there is a God shaped hole in all of our hearts. He is the only one that can fill it. Why do we put ourselves through the pain of constantly trying to fill it with everything but God?  Aside from the drugs and alcohol, I tried to fill it with horrible men, money, career, fame, etc. I truly believe He was watching over me all those years because I really should be dead. I’ve ended up in dark places in the middle of Hollywood doing drugs with people I didn’t even know. That night in 2002 on the bathroom floor, it took one simple prayer and God heard me. Did everything magically turn blissful that night? HECK NO! It’s been a long journey of healing. Growing out of the old behavior is gut wrenching hard, but freedom is on the other side and that’s my wish for all women. There’s too many living in bondage!

Is that you? I encourage you to acknowledge your pain, stop ignoring it, burying it or covering it up with the masks you wear. I was the queen of masks! I could be whatever you needed me to be. I was addicted to approval and got myself into toxic situations because I didn’t love myself and silenced my voice. It’s time for you to use your voice and begin loving yourself, sista. By no means am I totally empowered 24/7 and have my moments of weakness, but I’m proud of the woman I am today. I’m a work in progress and I’m ok with that. Use your lady balls and start strutting toward the path of freedom. The pain path will turn into the purpose path. I guarantee it.

Here’s the Access Hollywood interview if you missed it:

 

I want to be clear that I do not use being raped as a cop out for my decision to do topless love scenes on the Cinemax series. A few people have insinuated that on social media. Yes, I made several unwise decisions based in fear and I would never do an acting job like that now. I was desperate to work as an actress and own that I took my clothes off. Most of the actresses I admire have done much more explicit love scenes with full frontal nudity. It was a Rated R series and do not take on the media’s label of “porn star”. 

 

Are you ready to live in freedom on the path toward your purpose? Make a comment and let us know. There’s power in sharing it with others!

I will be private coaching again during the summer so if you’re interested send a request through the CONTACT PAGE. 

 

Also, get ready for the popular SOS Summer Beachbag Giveaway mid June! All of my favorites in one bag.

To celebrate the arrival of Summer, today through June 15th, all the #Tiffirmation Tee’s are 25% off. Go to http://thegivestore.myshopify.com  and enter discount code: JUNESALE25 at checkout. There’s a limited supply so don’t miss it!

Remember to take some time this week and refocus on your goals. We’re halfway through the year now and it’s important to check in with yourself to stay on track! Take action…

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Love & Ladyballs,

Tiff