5 THINGS TO LET GO OF IN 2015: The 1st Motivational Vlog of the Year

Hey Chicas!

Grab a cup of coffee, tea or a kale smoothie (wink) and your iPad and have some girl time with me. This is the very 1st motivational vlog of the 2015 and this time I’m giving you a list of 5 things to stop doing instead of adding more things to your to-do list this year. As we all plan to go bigger and elevate every aspect of our life we have to get rid of and grow out of behaviors that hold us back from being our ultimate best!

The heartfelt comments women are leaving on this video have inspired me and deepened my passion for the purpose of SOS. Women around the world are being braver than ever right now and stepping into their destiny.

Are YOU joining us? 

I hope so.

Love, Tiff

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STOP SHRINKING! You Are Meant to Live Big

 

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During my morning reading, the author made reference to my favorite quote by Marianne Williamson. I’ve loved this quote for many years, but the section that jumped out at me this morning was “your playing small does not serve the world”. This concept is part of the theme I want us all to live by this year! You may remember my new year wish that stated, “Laugh loud, love hard, live big”. Coming across this quote today solidified this theme for me.

Are you going to join me? 

Read the entire quote slowly:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” 

― Marianne WilliamsonA Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of “A Course in Miracles”

 

  • Have you been living small?
  • Are you afraid of your innate power?
  • Do you realize (really, really, realize) you are a child of God?
  • Do you dim your light and shrink around certain people?

I lived small, wasn’t powerful, didn’t know my worth as a child of God and would shrink back for years. I even wore brown, beige or black during that period. I know that’s why I was so drawn to this quote. It resonated with me and has been a driving force behind SOS.  2015 is our year to shine brighter and by doing so we will give others the freedom to shine their brightest as well. Yes, there will be those who feel threatened by your radiance, but DO NOT dim your light so they will feel comfortable. Some friends will prefer the small you because it makes them feel big. A true friend will grow with you and support the new, shinier you. Shrinking and dimming is truly a disservice to the world and a slap in God’s face. He created you to shine! 

The world does not need more women playing small. As my motto says, “confident women change the world”, so it’s time to stop dimming your light. The world is desperate for it. It’s time to stop holding back and start stepping out.. and struttin’ it! It’s time to stop crying and start laughing. It’s time to stop needing and start believing. It’s time to realize your gifts, share them and stop hiding them.

Small thinking leads to small actions which lead to a small life.

Big thinking leads to big actions which lead to a BIG LIFE.

Which do you choose?

Make a comment and share how you can live bigger in 2015.

Love, Tiff

PURPOSE GONE WILD by Guest Blogger Ashley Brown

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The Gift you are meant to give…

You are a rare specimen. I know that’s a random way of starting this blog, but its true! The fact that you are alive is confirmation that you have purpose. Out of MILLIONS of sperm and hundreds of thousands eggs, YOU WERE SELECTED TO BE HERE. This is simply amazing. In case you didn’t know, it only takes 1 sperm, and 1 egg to create a baby, and in that particular moment, you were created. This is phenomenal. There is a specific reason why you are here, and your purpose is directly linked to your passion.

Let’s talk passion today…

We all have our passions & interest. The problem comes when we fall into a hypnotic rhythm of imitating the lives of others, and fail to realize our own uniqueness. Those who are truly great and legendary are the ones who pursed their curiosities even when it was contrary to what everyone else was doing around them. They did not fear the opinions of others, they simply acted on their hearts desires and in turn, they made a significant contribution to the world. The problem with mass media and social media is that when you are so focused on the lives of others it can be a distraction and distort your thinking, making you believe that you are supposed to be in a position that you are not.

Truth is…

you are right where you need to be and as soon as you take your eyes off everyone else’s purpose you can start pursuing your own.

Don’t be afraid of your own happiness or success.

The world NEEDS that authentic thing you have to offer.

Imitating the masses is a sure way of neglecting your true calling. Dig deep to find your OWN creative voice. Copying is easy. Many people can do it and it makes money, but there is no rewarding feeling at the end of it. When you pursue your passions, that “rewarding” feeling is worth more than any dollar amount.

Take some time to revisit the things that captivate you.

The things that make your heart skip a beat or have you up for hours, researching, studying, dreaming etc. When you are really excited or passionate about something that is a green light that you are headed in the right direction. Some people have a misconception that discovering your purpose is supposed to be a drawn out struggle. It is actually the polar opposite. You are co-creating this life with the ultimate creator (God) and he has instilled a gift in you that will spark your interest.

It is important to act and dive deeper into even the most subtle passions that may seem random and pointless. For instance, if you have a passion for drawing on the ground with chalk, you may be able to start a campaign writing positive quotes on college campuses. As crazy as it may sound, extraordinary things happen when you take time to learn what drives you. God didn’t create anything that is not gifted. Master who you are, instead of being pre-occupied with everyone else.

As we head into the new year, I want you to rediscover your passions. Take some time to reflect back on what interested you as a child, and be confident on your pursuit of purpose. I can’t stress enough how living your purpose truly serves the world.

If your passions don’t line up with all the degrees you have received or career path you’ve been on, do not fear. It’s better to start now, than to look back 30 years from now, realizing you let all your passions die.

So…join me in re-discovering our passions and unwrapping the beautiful gift God has given us. #GettingMyLife #PurposeGoneWild (Hashtag! I want to see your success & progress.)

 Follow me: @AshleyEmpowers 

http://www.ashleyempowers.com

AshleyEmpowers

 

STRUTTIN’ TO YOUR BEAT

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A few weeks ago, I had a beautiful long girl’s weekend with my sister. These moments are so cherished now that we’re adults because we truly connect, listen, laugh and even cry a bit. We share self-help books and spiritual concepts and well, she just “gets” me. We are from the same womb…cut from the same cloth. Ya can’t chat about deep spiritual stuff with just anyone so I’m especially grateful to be able to share this part of my life with my sis. During one of our conversations that weekend, I had one of those A-ha moments that Oprah always talks about. I realized that I am officially part of the “I Don’t Give A Damn What People Think Club”. Pardon my French, but hey – there’s really no other way to put it. Revel with me for a moment…

WooHoo!

Yeehaw!

Bowchickabowow!

Hallelujah!

Sho nuff!  

If you’ve been part of SOS for a while you’ve heard me discuss the concept of people pleasing and wearing masks to be what everyone needed me to be. It’s been a long journey of healing, moving on and learning to love myself. This is why the foundation of SOS is about self-love and confidence building and not just clothes. We all know you can buy the most amazing wardrobe, bags & shoes, but if a woman isn’t comfortable in her own skin –  the outer fancy covering won’t cover up the internal mess. At least not for long. The truth always reveals itself. 

Over the years of growth, I’ve had moments of really ‘owning’ it and marching to the beat of my own drum. Recently, I’ve even had a few friends tell me that I do –  especially in regard to the way I dress or how I pick/choose the events I want to attend. Remember ladies, just because you are invited does not mean you have to say yes and accept. Especially when your family suffers not only from your absence, but also from your snappy attitude that comes from you being mad at yourself for saying yes. Sound familiar? I know many women battle people pleasing and seeking approval. It sucks the joy, peace & contentment right out of every fiber of your being and leaves you resenting everyone… and even more angry at yourself!

Oh, so you need me to be _________? Excuse me while I put on that mask so you accept me all while I diss myself. Ok, so now you need me to be ________? Hhhmmph. Let me find that mask real quick so you will feel comfortable while I go against my integrity, intuition, truth and feel completely uncomfortable. Many women get stuck in this rut and routine. It’s equivalent to living life in prison.

WHO WANTS TO BE PART OF THE FREEDOM CLUB? 

WHO HAS HAD MOMENTS OF TIP TOEING TO THE BEAT OF YOUR OWN DRUM, BUT YOU ARE READY TO WHOLEHEARTEDLY STRUT EVERY STEP OF THE WAY? 

It’s time to take ownership of your life! Do you really know what you want? I believe women who sway to everyone else’s beat and wear masks aren’t in touch with themselves and their needs. You certainly don’t have “doormat” written across your forehead so stop acting as if you do. PLEASE! When was the last time you asked yourself what YOU really want? Go have a chat with yourself today. 

Love yourself enough to stand up for what’s best for you… even if it disappoints others. Their temporary disappointed will be gone tomorrow, but when you diss yourself – the disappointment you feel toward you will resonate for days or even weeks. Stop disappointing yourself and start standing up for yourself. Sound like a deal?  

Respect yourself and your needs. How can you expect others to respect you if you don’t respect yourself and set healthy boundaries

Give me your two-cents! Are you already struttin’ to your own beat? Share your a-ha moment. I love seeing my mentoring clients come to this realization! It’s truly life-altering to see women live their truth without apology. 

It’s time to free yourself. Welcome to the club.

Love, Tiff

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4 Little Innocuous (but revolutionary) Phrases by Guest Blogger Natalie Bolton

 

4 agreements

Scientists have done studies on “happiness” and why some people seem to grasp it and why it eludes others. MINDSETS are one of the possible factors that will determine the quality you are able to see reflected in your life. And let me say, I am no perfect master at this, however, it I can just set an intention or two for the day it does help.

Take the book The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz, if one decided to challenge their everyday life with just one of these agreements a day this could totally shift the baseline of the mind, just by focusing on one.

These four little innocuous phrases can be revolutionary!

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BE IMPECCABLE WITH YOUR WORD. (I may just take this one on everyday for an entire month)

If I can make the promise to myself to be impeccable with my word that means that I believe that what I say means something and impacts my life and others. If I just say “YES” to everything and over schedule myself then I end up flaking out of something and letting someone down. So my “yes” should be solid, strong, and valuable. And if I’m putting my word behind it-I need to pay close attention to what I am signing off on in my life. People are affected by my loose over scheduling, over committing, and under delivering (one of my life challenges).

DON’T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY.

I am uber sensitive. I have pinned it on being creative, artistic, a Capricorn, and moody. Blah blah blah…whatever. I have been sensitive in my life because I have taken things personally. What is so amazing in this life is that no one is ever really doing anything on account of anyone else. Honestly, we are so self-consumed that when someone hurts our feelings 9 times out of 10 the hurter of the feelings was completely unaware and in their own world. When someone “consciously” seemed to personally hit you where it hurts it is due to his or her own fear- his or her own perception, and his or her own battle that they are fighting. When I can remember this I am no longer at the affect of someone else. Yah, we all act out sometimes but if we can pause and think that maybe just maybe that person’s issue has zero to do with us it allows us to continue to buzz throughout our life. Then we are able to put our efforts into things that truly matter.

DON’T MAKE ASSUMPTIONS.

There have been times more often than not, sadly, where I have written an Oscar-worthy drama of “Gone with the Wind” proportions that actually in reality never even happened. Now, don’t judge me and say ”Oh, hmmm, did she just admit that she hears voices in her head…hmmm? Did she just announce her crazy to the world?” NO. What I am saying is I think we all at some point have created storied to back up our colorful imaginations. For example, someone doesn’t pick up his beautiful Great Dane’s poop from your yard turns into “Why does so-and-so hate me?” Or a teenager cackles you from across the street turns into “Oh my god! My cool factor has expired and I am officially old.” Or your partner forgetting the dinner at 8 date turns into “He doesn’t love me and he never did love me!” I know I am NOT the only one so reader don’t squint your eyes and poke fun-we all have done it (hormonal fluctuations could be the culprit most times). Nevertheless, we all have had these ridiculous conversations with ourselves. If I can make the choice to NOT assume, I can show up in the world as an adult and ask real questions to get the real answers. Such as, “hey, poop perpetrator, I have a stash of bags here in case anyone walking their dog needs one in a pinch. Have I told you before that they were here?” Poop perpetrator replies, “Oh man, good to know, the other day we totally left a present in your yard because I forgot the bag and also locked myself out of my house resulting in being late for work and forgetting to come back and pick it up. That is what these flowers picked from my garden are for. My sincerest apologies.” The teenager scenario is simply a teenager scenario. And the forgetting of the date drama? Maybe a question such as “So, by you forgetting about our dinner plans is a simple glitch resulting from you being overworked and overscheduled?” And that gives your partner the opportunity to express his or her love for you and how they were actually getting so involved in planning a surprise weekend get-a-way that they simply forgot about the dinner at hand. Problems solved with simple real questions.

ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST.

What does “The Best” scale look like? Well, it is different everyday and moment by moment. One minute I can extend love to a complete stranger on a plane by listening to her heart for the entire 3-hour flight, and the very next moment I can get annoyed and react to the person kicking the back of my seat. Our best is continually changing but if we are striving to always keep our best forefront in our minds we can avoid the all too common abusive self-talk and regret we love to punish ourselves with. You may be able to run the LA marathon after training at your best, but when you are laid out sick from the flu just getting up from the couch to go to the bathroom is your absolute best. Be kind to yourself and always keep your “BEST” as the goal.

 

Fall can be our best season yet. It can be a time of restoration on many levels.  And our mindset can be the solution to problems we have been unable to fix until now.

Small tweaks powerful impact.

 Thrive on,

 Natalie.

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In Natalie’s own words she shares her personal philosophy, “The mandate for my life is not only bringing beauty to people by external means with new technologies, and cutting-edge technique, my goal is to also refresh the spirit. I pray every morning to bring beauty to the spirit of everyone I touch-so they leave feeling more beautiful and at peace after they leave me. I want to live my life like that as well. I want to leave the world more beautiful than when I found it.”

From CBS’s SURVIVOR to skincare, my sister Natalie Bolton has landed at VANITY LOUNGE in Houston, TX. (Yay, do you know how happy our mom is to have both her girls back in the Great State!!)  Having the opportunity to fulfill her desire to bring beauty, healing and a sense of well being to men and women alike, Natalie has found her calling. As a state-board licensed aesthetician and certified Epicuren specialist, Natalie enhances the appearance and condition of her clients’ skin and their sense of self. Her specialties include rejuvenation and anti-aging. Natalie is also an expert in the areas of acne and problematic skin.

To book your appointment with Nat, call 713-942-9177 or book online.   Vanity Lounge is located at 2800 Kirby Drive #B110
Houston, TX 77098 in the Tootsies shopping center across from Eddie V’s. 

 

Do You Need To ReLaunch Your Life?

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Do you feel stuck? I did for a long time!

Do you sense that the path you’re on is taking you in the wrong direction? Whew, I was way off track! 

Do you secretly desire a new career path, but the fear of the uncertainty paralyzes you? Fear was my middle name for years! 

Do you numb yourself and the fear with over spending, food, alcohol or too much television? I did all of the above! 

 

I’m honored to have been asked to share my life experience and a few deeper parts of my journey to creating SOS – on the hit iTunes radio show, RELAUNCH! with Joel Boggess and Dr. Pei Kang. Joel is a life coach and the author of the #1 Amazon bestselling book – Finding your Voice.  Pei is a business executive and a gifted endodontist (root canal specialist) and yoga instructor.

I know Joel and Pei would love it if you subscribed and shared their iTunes show with your friends who need this type of inspiration! 

As much I love working on camera, radio sure was fun and can be done without makeup! Holla!  This is a special episode to me as I have only shared some of these experiences here on the blog with you…so I would really appreciate if you made a comment and let me know your thoughts on the subject. I know God is opening the door and giving me the courage to share more of my story publicly.  

Please don’t go another day living with your dreams dormant inside you! 

Release the fear & relaunch, sista. If you need my personalized, private mentoring to guide you in this area- please contact me for details and pricing. Serious inquiries only. If you are not ready to do the work it takes to create lasting results – a coach or mentor will not help you!  

CLICK TO LISTEN TO PODCAST NOW! 

 

Love, Tiff

 

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BE LIMITLESS: 3 More Months to Rock 2013

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Can you believe we are in the first week of October? Fall is officially here and it’s and exciting time because we have 3 more months to kick some serious bootie in 2013. Are there a few things on your goal list that you haven’t checked off yet? Are you struggling with a few intentions you’ve set? What is holding you back? 

For the remainder of the year, I challenge us all to be limitless in our thinking and get out of our comfort zone:

    • THINK BIGGER!  If you think small, you achieve little.  Huge risk, Huge reward!
    • EXPAND YOUR VISION!  Look beyond what’s right in front of your face everyday!
    • TAKE ON NEW CHALLENGES! This builds confidence and forces you to grow!
    • PUSH THE BOUNDARIES! Your comfort zone isn’t the Great Wall of China. It’s just in your mind and you can do anything you set your mind to!
    • KARATE KICK YOUR FEARS!  Be like a warrior and kick the crap out of your fears instead of the other way around!
    • DON’T LET ANYTHING OR ANYONE STOP YOU!  Nuff said.
    • TAKE BABY STEPS!  This helps you stay grounded.  Stepping out can cause you to feel off kilter. Taking it slow will keep you balanced.
    • GET OFF THE HAMSTER WHEEL!  Being in your comfort zone can make you feel like you’re going in circles and getting nowhere!
    • STOP MAKING EXCUSES!  Excuses are useless!
    • JUST DO IT!  Once you make up your mind to do something, just get out there and do it already!
Our thoughts are powerful.  We can talk ourselves into, doing or NOT doing, anything. You may say, “I don’t have the money to do this or that or I just don’t have the time”, and trust me- I have used those excuses, but remember, excuses are useless!   They serve no purpose except for keeping you from truly enjoying ALL that life has to offer!   I have learned to feel comfortable being uncomfortable living outside my comfort zone.  Ultimately, it is more uncomfortable for us to stay in the same old, same old. 
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How are you going to dig deep and end the year on a high note?

Please share your thoughts. Putting it out there and sharing with others makes it more real and creates a sense of accountability.

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Have a fab week full of karate kicking your fears, great hair days and shining brightly!

Love, Tiff