Wings Or The Worm

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 Hey, Hey, Hey!

Are you conscious of your behavior after a phone call or coffee date with a certain friend who brings out your weaknesses instead of your strengths? For example, you chat with a dear friend who is always complaining and venting her drama- complete with a few curse words for punctuation- and the rest of the day you are whining, focusing on your burdens instead of your blessings and cursing like a sailor. Trust me, I am no Miss Priss and have a fiery personality so a few curse words may fly out of my mouth when I get heated. Not proud of it- just keepin’ it real. As I always say- I’m a work in progress! My point is how interesting we are as humans to emulate and model those we hang around. We may be Spiritually-conscious and awake with our shelves filled with self-help books, but it is easy to get sucked in to the chicken coop instead of rising above and soaring like the eagle that we are.  

I love listening to T.D. Jakes during my power walks and a few days ago he said one simple phrase that struck a chord in me. He said, “Are you associating with people who bring out the wings in you or the worm in you?” Obviously, he’s referring to the beautiful idea of transformation through the butterfly. I posted this on Facebook, but wanted to elaborate and start the discussion here on the blog. We are always in a state of growth and transformation- at least I hope we are! I realize you have joined this community because you place your personal growth, development and empowerment as a priority. As an ‘instigator of change and an ‘agent of transformation’, I thrive on constant growth. The minute I feel stagnant in any area of my life- I’ve got to switch things up, change the behavior and expand a bit. 

We can always be a little bit better today than we were yesterday and I will keep that philosophy until I’m 85.

A vital aspect of our growth is who we surround ourselves with.  Are you associating with those who challenge you to come up higher & encourage you to fly?  A few of my girlfriends are gifted encouragers. They have the ability to hone in on someone’s strengths and lift that person up by pointing out and vocalizing these positive traits. They bring out the wings in that person! Don’t you love being around people like that?!  Often times, we are able to reveal a strength in someone that they didn’t even realize they had. By doing so, we open that person up to their full potential which puts them in a position to fly.

On the other hand, we must be mindful of those who try to bring out the worm in us. You know that friend that likes to include you when she’s talking about her own short comings. She says things like, “We have a hard time losing weight because WE are just lazy”. Then you start questioning yourself, “Am I fat? She’s right- I am lazy”. {Record Scratch} Counteract it by kindly not accepting those negative words over your life and respond with something like, “I’m happy with my weight and work out 4-5 times a week. ‘Lazy’ is not a title I care to wear, thank you”. Of course, then there’s the family member who tries to make you feel bad that you are a ‘driven dreamer’ who appreciates nice things. Misery loves company. It takes all kinds to make the world go round and we can love them and learn from them, but we can also limit our exposure to them. When you’re around the critical ones, stand firm in your beliefs and positivity.

Make sure you are rubbing off on them and not the other way around.   

ACTION STEP: Take a look around you. Who do you spend the most time with? Wing peeps or worm peeps? Make a conscious effort to spend more time with friends who are positive and living a life of excellence & purpose! Those who speak about life with enthusiasm. We all have a Destiny to fulfill so it’s crucial to associate with those who help you come up higher and stay on your path- and vice versa. 

We become like those we hang around. Surround yourself with those who like to soar. Be the wind beneath each other’s wings! 

As always, I love to hear your thoughts.

Comment, Tweet + Share the SOS love!

Love, Tiff

 

P.S. Don’t forget about the fun Summer Kickoff Giveaway happening! Details on the 7 Summer Drugstore Steals post. Ends June 6th. Win a few products below OR a Target gift card plus the new Aaron Hendra Project CD & T-shirt. 

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STRESS: Make It A Manageable Beast

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Question- What’s your stress level on a regular basis?  You are probably wondering, “Tiff, what does that have to do with beauty, style or inspiration?”…well, it has a lot to do with how healthy, vibrant, aware, sharp, peaceful and powerful you feel.  Constant stress is carried on your face and will dull your light and not to mention over time it can cause serious dis-ease in your body. So, let’s discuss this because I am personally checking in with myself and my own stress levels on a regular basis and I find everywhere I turn people are just out-of-their-mind STRESSED OUT!  This is no way to live ladies. LIFE IS SHORT!

I’m about to keep it very real here…

In the past I lived in a constant state of high anxiety because I had not healed through my issues and like many people I numbed myself with drugs and alcohol. A friend convinced me to see a doctor and of course, they put me on anti-depressants, anti-anxiety pills and ambien to sleep because I would be so amped up from the other pills.  WHEW! It’s a vicious cycle with this stuff and I couldn’t function long on all these RX’s.  For me, the only thing that worked to calm the nerves was to turn to God, begin red flagging my stressors and begin a serious spiritual practice of prayer & journaling. As I began to crack open my spirit and face my issues, I was more in tune with myself and the things, situations and PEOPLE that stressed me out. Learning to manage your stress will change your life and the lives of those around you!  It truly effects every area of our lives:

  • Sleep Difficulties
  • Loss of Appetite or Over-eating
  • Lack of Concentration
  • Sloppy performance on the job
  • Anti-social Behavior
  • Abusing Alcohol or Drugs
  • Nervous Habits
  • Short Temper
  • Poor Memory

Does that sound about right? Make it a priority to check in with yourself on a regular basis and deal with the stress so it doesn’t grow into an unmanageable beast.

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Here’s 20 tips I have found to help:

  1. Do not keep things bottled up! Talk to someone you trust to help you work through it.
  2. Spend time daily doing an activity you love. (I clear my head with a long powerwalk)
  3. Improve your diet! Eating vitamin rich foods and avoiding junk with preservatives will keep your nervous system functioning properly. Add a B complex supplement too!
  4. Simplify! This is so important but very difficult for “busy bodies”. Stop taking on too many activities at once. You know the popular saying, “my plate is so full”. Well, change that!
  5. Stop rushing! When you feel panicked or rushed, STOP- sit quietly, take a deep breath and regain your composure.
  6. Keep a zen-like peaceful environment at work and at home.
  7. Be present! Don’t put too much thought into the future or the past. Enjoy the NOW!
  8. Avoid unrealistic expectations on yourself and others! Whew- this will alleviate a ton of stress.
  9. Get enough sleep!
  10. Exercise  more! It produces “feel good” chemicals.
  11. Take note of your moods! Ladies, we have those pesky hormones to deal with so be aware of how you’re feeling emotionally and cut yourself a break when you need to.
  12. Explore relaxation methods: Yoga, walking, journaling, listening to soothing music, hiking, etc.
  13. Express yourself! If you feel sad, allow yourself a good cry. If you’re angry, express it constructively. (Breaking plates not allowed)
  14. Love people and use things! Not the other way around. Walking in love is a huge stress reducer. Drop the ego.
  15. Take a techno break! Unplug the phone, stay off the computer, don’t watch TV. Often these things bring major stress into our life and we don’t even realize it.
  16. Learn the power of saying “NO”.  This brings tons of stress on many woman. Being a ‘people pleaser’ will ultimately stress you out and build resentment!
  17. Do not use crutches! Food, cigarettes, drugs or alcohol will also ultimately add to your stress instead of the temporary relief of it.
  18. Avoid boredom! Period.
  19. Surround yourself with positive peeps!  Stress and negativity are contagious so hang out with positive, uplifting friends.
  20. Get in touch with the little kid inside you on a regular basis!  Try to have more fun and find things that give you a good belly laugh every once in a while.

Most important thing of all – GRACE!  It gives you the strength and power to get done what you need to even when you think you can’t. Tap into it.

Have a beautiful weekend sistas!

Love, Tiff

WHAT’S YOUR STATUS? By LeeAnne Locken

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Drum Roll…

I am thrilled to announce that my soul sister and dear friend of 20+ years, LeeAnne Locken has just self-published her first book called “What’s Your Status? Finding Your Way To A More Positive Life One Day At A Time!”  If you follow her Facebook Page, you already know how uplifting her daily posts are and have seen the thousands of people who stop by her page for their daily dose of LeeAnne Love .  Her new book is a collection of  these daily posts which are designed to motivate, inspire and encourage others to be their best!  LeeAnne and I moved to Dallas together many moons ago and I can attest to her being a ray of sunshine in the mornings.  We have shared several cups of coffee and inspiring morning chats together.  She is a natural encourager with a heart of gold.  I highly recommend picking up your copy today and begin a daily journey with LeeAnne as she encourages you to live a more POSITIVE LIFE one post at a time!  Available in paperback & kindle.

Here’s a sample post:

Today is the first day

of the rest of your life…

What will you do with it?

How will you live it?

Ask yourself these

simple questions,

then GO GET IT!

You are a one-of-a-kind

masterpiece of GOD!

Now, go LIVE like it!

~~~

Join me in supporting LeeAnne by sharing, liking and tweeting this post!

Spread the love + inspiration,

Tiff

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ETERNALLY MOTIVATED {Sunday Affirmations + New Year’s Wish}

Hey Rockstar!

Never-never-never-give-up

Who is ready to kick some serious bootie in 2013?  I SURE AM!  Don’t you love the sense of clarity, focus, drive and motivation that comes with the clean slate we’re all given on Jan 1st?  How do YOU keep your level of drive and motivation high all the way through the following Dec?  Do you seem to putter out and give up by the end of Feb?  Several of you have written in lately and asked for my tips on staying MOTIVATED with working out and eating right so I taped a new video with a few suggestions for changing your mindset.  This is the perfect topic as we begin the New Year…..

WATCH THIS:

 

THIS YEAR I WILL….

  1. Believe in myself MORE than ever.

  2. Go make things happen instead of WHINING about it.

  3. Hang motivational AFFIRMATIONS on my mirror + fridge.

  4. Create a vision board + watch my goals/dreams MANIFEST.

  5. Create a playlist of music that makes me want to MOVE.

  6. Embrace my flaws. They’re what make me UNIQUE!

  7. Stay motivated for LIFE…not just through Feb.

  8. TREAT myself to a new pair of fancy tennis shoes + workout clothes.

  9. Eat protein + vitamin rich ORGANIC FOODS.

  10. Love, nurture, cherish + adore ME!

  11. JUST DO IT!

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My wish for all of you is to find more peace and happiness in 2013 than you ever thought possible.  It all starts with YOU!  Making the choice to love yourself will keep you motivated FOR LIFE!  Look ahead with excitement and let the adventure begin.  Make yourself proud sista!

Thank you for being part of this Sisterhood.  I plan to bring you even more tips, insight, inspiration and encouragement to help strengthen and empower you in 2013.  Please make a comment and share any topics you are interested in discussing.  I want to hear from you!

Lastly, I cannot stress enough the importance of goal setting and visualizing for the year ahead.  Take some quiet time, search your heart and write out your goals and dreams.  Take a few days to do this if need be!  Don’t rush it.  I make it a fun, childlike and creative process and pull out my markers.

A great idea is to list your goals in sections as well.  For example, list them by Personal and Career/Business or take it a step further and list them by 1. Spirit 2. Family 3. Body 4. Career.  I just looked over my 2012 goals and it’s fun to see what has transpired!  If you’re a Pinterest fanatic, create a board of your new year’s goals.  Hmmm, I think I may have to do that myself!

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Remain in harmony with God’s will and plan for your life.

Happy New Year! 

With Love + Gratitude,

Tiff

A bit of Beauty + Style with a whole lot of Inspiration

Hey Sassafrass!

Hope your week has been full of love, laughter, beauty, magic, blessings, good hair days, leopard shoes and a blemish-free chin!  I had the extreme pleasure of having a girlie lunch with one of our beautiful and inspiring SOS Sisters, the dahhh’ling  Suanne Arvay Rieker.  She is the epitome of health, radiance, positive energy, style, spunk and sass… (I want to be like Suanne when I grow up)  She is also THE example of what a brave female entrepreneur can create in her life.  Ok, can you tell I am her biggest fan? I can’t rave about her enough and feel so blessed to have had the opportunity to meet her in person on her first trip to Hollywood!

More Inspiration…

If you are on the Facebook Page , you may have seen my post about the amazing book by Marianne Williamson, ILLUMINATA.   It is full of beautiful prayers to get you through just about ANY situation.  Here’s a candid video sharing a beautiful passage from her Prayer for Achievement:

A bit of Beauty + Style:

I feel like I have been on the search for the PERFECT eye cream to deflate my bags and puffiness FOREVER.  I have battled bags under my eyes since the age of 12. Seriously!  Hallallujahhhhh, Nucerity launched my dream eye serum and I have actually seen results QUICK!  So has a fellow SOS sister. Here’s what she said:  “Tiff, I just have to let you know that the eye serum is definitely working for my under eye puffiness…The bags have literally totally disappeared . My dermatologist noticed, my husband and my friends!! So I’m very  happy about that!”  YAY!  If you would like to try it, go to the link on the right side of the blog. Preferred Customers enjoy a significant discount! Bye Bye Puffy Eyes!

For Fall 2012, don’t be afraid to rock the METALLIC JEAN!  It’s such a fun option to the staple- black- skinny- jeans for date nightPair them with the same tops, blazers and accessories that you would with any jeans. ROCK ON!

Are you on Twitter? Let’s tweet together: @SanctuaryStyle and my personal account is @TiffanyHendra

Please share SOS with your girlfriends!

Remember helping others is good for your complexion!  It makes you feel happy…..then it shows on your cheeks!

Love, Tiff

POSITIVE ENERGY + how to not absord the negative!

Hey My Fabulous Fashionista Friends!

Who is feeling that magical transition to Pre-Fall? As much as I completely Love (I mean seriously L O V E) summer, I equally love that change in the air as the seasons begin to change.  For me, it is always a fun time of year because my birthday is always that final summer celebration and let me tell you– I had an AWESOME birthday and was royally spoiled by family and friends complete with a quick jaunt to Vegas.  This leads me to this week’s topic= ENERGY + INTUITION.  Now, I truly love getting out of town for a sec no matter where it is, but Vegas is a whole other cup of tea.  It’s not my fave place on the planet, but I can seem to find fun wherever! There are people, people and more people in Sin City and I often leave feeling an “energy drain” from the crowds. Do you relate to what I’m talking about?  It’s as if someone took a vacuum hose to my gut and sucked out all my positive energy. So I’ve spent the past few days refueling.  If you are like me and “feel” other people’s energy and vibes to the point that it drains you- here’s a few tips on transforming the “energy drain” back into a positive feeling and get your vibrancy back!  If you are overly “empathetic”, you probably deal with this issue because you are like a SPONGE and absorb people’s energy:

  1. PROTECT YOURSELF.  Before heading into the masses, stop- say a prayer and ask to be shielded with white light from the top of your head down to your tippy toes.  Ok, this may sound corny, but God will protect you!
  2. BE AWARE. Take notice of how you feel in a certain environment and around certain people.  Do you crave your “comfort foods” after being exposed to negative people or do you feel like drinking more? This is important to be aware of because we are physically trying to correct an emotional issue. (I have a touch of social anxiety and “feel” peoples energy very quickly so I tend to grab for that extra glass of wine to deal. I don’t recommend it- just being honest)
  3. RINSE IT OFF. Believe it or not, a hot bath or shower can “cleanse” you of negative energy.  Washing away negative energy will release you from “carrying” that energy and keep you sane.  Let all the negative energy go right down the drain!

PLEASE comment and let me know if you deal with this and if you have found a great remedy that works for you!

Switching Gears to a Fun Fashion Topic!

I will be taping a few Fall inspired webisodes this week to give you the 411 on the “must have’s” and also the things you can skip! As a self-proclaimed Texas “boot girl”,  my fave fave fave thing about Fall is a GREAT BOOT! Just about any style of boot is hot this season.  What is YOUR fave type of boot? Wedge, Bootie, Motorcycle, Over-the-Knee?

Remember to join us on the Facebook Page for some fun convo’s!

Here are a few great affirmations for the week ahead posted by our Style Sisters:

  • I WILL not put up w/ ANY NEGATIVITY! -Teri
  • Feeling like the little engine that could…I WILL be a light. I will be productive. I will give and receive beautiful energy. I will be a blessing. I will honor the divinity within me.-Teia
  • I WILL begin each day by being grateful for my many blessings.-Dianna
  •  I WILL flirt!-Diane
  • I WILL never give up and dream big!-Kay
  • I WILL start to wake up earlier and give my time to God before I go on with my day as I lack in that area sometimes as well as do something nice for my self at least once a day.-Christina
  • I WILL wake up every morning with the thought that something fabulous is about to happen!-Cheryl
  • I WILL spend time daily in prayer and turn to God when I need peace instead of distracting myself with things that ultimately don’t matter. -Kari
  • I WILL spend more time on me!-Jo

I know too well what it’s like to live a life of low self-esteem and even a shame-based life….this is why I started SOS.  ALL women deserve to live the life of their dreams no matter where they started in life…..we can all end up someplace beautiful, successful, powerful, positive and abundant!  It doesn’t matter where you start, but with belief + effort we can all end up someplace totally fabulous!  Make sure to share SOS with your girlfriends.  

Share the Beauty, Style + Inspiration.

THANK YOU FOR JOINING ME!

Love ,Tiff