HAPPY SUNDAY SISTA!

I’m sure many of you are getting geared up for Superbowl Sunday, but I just had to share these 10 tips I stumbled upon. Last week, I celebrated a dear friend stepping boldly into a new endeavor by launching her YouTube Channel and new series called Whit’s Kitch. WHOOP! Make sure to check it out and subscribe! It was an honor to be Whitney’s first guest and we had a total blast doing special live videos to tell everyone about it. I’m thinking of doing special SOS Live videos now. It’s a fun way to engage with you ladies! Wanna? 

Ok, back to the topic. I mentioned on Facebook Live how frustrating it is when some of those close to us can’t seem to encourage or acknowledge our accomplishments. I spoke about how important it is to surround yourself with women who have your back and speak life into your dreams. I especially realized the importance of this over the wild few years I just had! Whitney is a natural encourager and walks her talk in this area. She has a gift to point out and pull out your gifts. I just had to praise her and speak (well, it really was a rant) on the importance of this– especially for women.

I’m so grateful for the “tribe” of spiritually conscious women in my life who selflessly pat me on the back and highlight my strengths. Happy, strong women compliment others and know the power in lifting other women up. Confident women support your dreams and celebrate your wins.

When people have difficulty in this area it’s usually a projection of how unhappy they are in their own life. These people freely point out the weaknesses in others as a way of making themselves feel superior. We NEVER, ever, ever lift ourselves up by putting others down. I’ve learned to just pray for these people and focus on the people who confidently lift others up. May we all strive to speak life into others more this year. Stop speaking death. Everyone needs this, not just women. For example, stop tearing down your husband, praise him for all he does right instead of pointing out all the things he does wrong.

The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.

Proverbs 18:21

Sanctuary Of Style is all about building up women. I pray daily for this community and that it creates a ripple effect. If you want to grow in this area, here’s a great article I found:

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We are living in a self-serving, self-centered, and self-obsessed modern day rush-rush society filled with negativity and constant tearing down of others. If you want to really differentiate yourself in this world, be people-oriented and start to focus on building others up.

Created as relational beings, it’s our greatest privilege to enjoy companionship with the people who truly matter in our lives. How can we then be a source of encouragement to our friends, family, and loved ones today?

Here’s 10 simple ways to build each other up:

1. Esteem others higher. Leaders esteem others higher than themselves. Have high regards, great respect, and favorable thoughts of the people in your circle of trust and influence.
2. Be wise in your speech. Communicate more effectively by thinking before you speak. If there’s a word that’s more appropriate in a conversation, use it. Start with a praise. Never confront others. Instead, point out on how both of you can make things better. Speak at the same level as your audience; giving them due respect. There’s no need to come in with an authoritarian voice to get your message heard.
3. Be encouraging. Encouragement is an expression and assurance of one’s hope and future in words, presence, and sincerity.
4. Be quick to forgive. When others make a mistake, be quick to forgive and forget; releasing them from guilt and shame that may take root in one’s heart when not dealt with over time.
5. Be understanding. Wisdom and understanding go hand in hand. Understanding starts by being an active listener (not planning a reply as one is speaking), asking intelligent questions to gain further insights, and being accepting of what the speaker is sharing. Then, answer without condemning. Or don’t answer at all and decide to just be a listening ear.
6. Zero gossip. Keep others’ secrets. Never speak stuff that causes unnecessary hurt to others by speaking unclaimed rumors behind their back.
7. Share knowledge. Found an article or book that’s useful? Share it with your friends. Sharing has been made easier thanks to the accessibility of sharing tools on the web, along with help from social media sites such as Twitter and Facebook. Sharing knowledge helps us learn, discover, and understand things that are interesting. They have immediate application for better results in our work and life, edifies our soul, and improves our daily conversations.
8. Stay humble. Humility and maturity are synonymous. A dignified person accomplishes much, but brags little. They are secure in their standing without needing to make noise, often treating everyone with tremendous respect, regardless of position.
9. Be positive! Positive thinking goes beyond having the drive and motivation for personal success. Positive thinking is explicit, definite, and outspoken. It’s contagious. Build up your loved ones with your positiveness, allowing them to be open for better things to come.
10. Love. “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails … And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” (1 Corinthians 13, NIV). Building up a person with the 9 ways mentioned is only made effective when done so together with love. Care for your loved ones how you would want to be cared for. Build up one another how you would like to be inspired. As a result, you will move up to a whole new level of breakthroughs in life.

Going one step further, visualize how and to whom you can build up and inspire changes for the better. Then work towards making that a reality.

Continue encouraging and building one another up. And start seeing growth and advancements in your relationship with people and to the ones who truly matter to you today.

“You need to be aware of what others are doing, applaud their efforts, acknowledge their successes, and encourage them in their pursuits. When we all help one another, everybody wins.” – Jim Stovall

This is an excerpt from Daniel Richard‘s latest ebook, Doing With LESS: Your journey as a new minimalist, and the art of stress-free living. He is a blogger, an author and a freelance writer. You can follow him on Twitter.

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