STRUTTIN’ TO YOUR BEAT

Beat_Own_drum

A few weeks ago, I had a beautiful long girl’s weekend with my sister. These moments are so cherished now that we’re adults because we truly connect, listen, laugh and even cry a bit. We share self-help books and spiritual concepts and well, she just “gets” me. We are from the same womb…cut from the same cloth. Ya can’t chat about deep spiritual stuff with just anyone so I’m especially grateful to be able to share this part of my life with my sis. During one of our conversations that weekend, I had one of those A-ha moments that Oprah always talks about. I realized that I am officially part of the “I Don’t Give A Damn What People Think Club”. Pardon my French, but hey – there’s really no other way to put it. Revel with me for a moment…

WooHoo!

Yeehaw!

Bowchickabowow!

Hallelujah!

Sho nuff!  

If you’ve been part of SOS for a while you’ve heard me discuss the concept of people pleasing and wearing masks to be what everyone needed me to be. It’s been a long journey of healing, moving on and learning to love myself. This is why the foundation of SOS is about self-love and confidence building and not just clothes. We all know you can buy the most amazing wardrobe, bags & shoes, but if a woman isn’t comfortable in her own skin –  the outer fancy covering won’t cover up the internal mess. At least not for long. The truth always reveals itself. 

Over the years of growth, I’ve had moments of really ‘owning’ it and marching to the beat of my own drum. Recently, I’ve even had a few friends tell me that I do –  especially in regard to the way I dress or how I pick/choose the events I want to attend. Remember ladies, just because you are invited does not mean you have to say yes and accept. Especially when your family suffers not only from your absence, but also from your snappy attitude that comes from you being mad at yourself for saying yes. Sound familiar? I know many women battle people pleasing and seeking approval. It sucks the joy, peace & contentment right out of every fiber of your being and leaves you resenting everyone… and even more angry at yourself!

Oh, so you need me to be _________? Excuse me while I put on that mask so you accept me all while I diss myself. Ok, so now you need me to be ________? Hhhmmph. Let me find that mask real quick so you will feel comfortable while I go against my integrity, intuition, truth and feel completely uncomfortable. Many women get stuck in this rut and routine. It’s equivalent to living life in prison.

WHO WANTS TO BE PART OF THE FREEDOM CLUB? 

WHO HAS HAD MOMENTS OF TIP TOEING TO THE BEAT OF YOUR OWN DRUM, BUT YOU ARE READY TO WHOLEHEARTEDLY STRUT EVERY STEP OF THE WAY? 

It’s time to take ownership of your life! Do you really know what you want? I believe women who sway to everyone else’s beat and wear masks aren’t in touch with themselves and their needs. You certainly don’t have “doormat” written across your forehead so stop acting as if you do. PLEASE! When was the last time you asked yourself what YOU really want? Go have a chat with yourself today. 

Love yourself enough to stand up for what’s best for you… even if it disappoints others. Their temporary disappointed will be gone tomorrow, but when you diss yourself – the disappointment you feel toward you will resonate for days or even weeks. Stop disappointing yourself and start standing up for yourself. Sound like a deal?  

Respect yourself and your needs. How can you expect others to respect you if you don’t respect yourself and set healthy boundaries

Give me your two-cents! Are you already struttin’ to your own beat? Share your a-ha moment. I love seeing my mentoring clients come to this realization! It’s truly life-altering to see women live their truth without apology. 

It’s time to free yourself. Welcome to the club.

Love, Tiff

Oprah_quote_whoIam

Advertisements

What Are You Seeking? (plus need quick beauty video)

Hola SOS Senoritas!

(I’m making my famous guacamole for a party so I’ve got Spanish on the brain)

Are you ready to have another amazing week? I sure am. I adore weekends, but I’m also excited when a new week begins. New opportunities, new chances to be better, new obstacles to overcome, etc. Many of you sent me beautiful private messages expressing how touched, inspired and moved you were by my last post on GRATITUDE. I want to thank you all again for taking the time to write me and reveal your hearts. We’ve got some pretty darn extraordinary sistas in this bunch with big beautiful hearts. WOW! I want to reach through the computer and hug all of you. {{SQUEEZE}}

This morning I was thinking about the underprivileged young women I mentor and it’s such a shame that so many women are held back in life because they are seeking the APPROVAL of others. It’s like living in a cage. It can really be debilitating and prevent you from trying different things and just GOING FOR IT.  It typically stems from not getting the approval we needed as a child.  Looking back, I craved my Dad’s approval and never really felt like I got it. So, I was pretty much addicted to approval most of my life and I still have to “check myself” from time to time.  It has taken a loooooong time to figure out that looking inward for validation and self-acceptance was true FREEDOM! Woohoo! Yeehaw! Fly little birdie!  We all have the key within us to unlock the cage. How awesome is that to truly be able to live in freedom and not care what other people think about you?!? If you like you….. and you appreciate you……. and YOU APPROVE OF YOU………you are on your way to soaring as high as you possibly can.  WHO WANTS TO FLY? This week, be aware of the people and situations where you feel caged by this needless “seeking” of approval. When I’m feeling insecure, needy or PMS’ing, I can even get stuck seeking the approval of my own husband. Which is absurd because from day one- the man has accepted me just the way I am with all the baggage that I had and my many high-maintenance quirks! We all need to get out of our own way and love + accept ourselves EXACTLY the way God created us and get on with it already……get busy FLYING HIGH! 

How appropriate– I love that this week’s swag bag giveaway item from the fabulous LUSCIOUS SOUL is a glamorous “Couture Key” by Keys to my Castle.  Your own house key can be professionally cut on this beautiful key.

Now let’s totally switch gears here! In the latest webisode, I answer a beauty question from Melissa:

Make sure to join in on the FACEBOOK fun! There’s only a few more weeks of Swag Bag Giveaways.  Share this with your girlfriends too. I love that a few of you are having fun on SOS with your daughters. That’s exactly what I always dreamed of!  Women from all walks of life, best friends, moms, daughters, sisters, etc…..all joining the fun.  Getting better and building our confidence should be fun, right!?

Love, Tiff