[My sis Natalie, Dad, Mom & I on vacay in West Tx on the Frio River]
But, it wasn’t always that way. I have mentioned on the blog that my relationship with my dad hasn’t always been healthy. My sister has also had her own journey with finding common ground and forgiveness in her relationship with him. Our dad became a father at the young age of 22. I can’t imagine having two daughters by the time I was 26! His generation did what they were taught and did the best they could. My dad was a great provider and a stern disciplinarian, but he was emotionally unavailable. Honestly, the poor guy was outnumbered and had to deal with three females in the house so if I put myself in his shoes – he really got the short end of the stick. I would have probably stayed out in the garage most of the time too! HaHa!
This past week proves that people CAN change, evolve, grow and accept one another. We just took our first family vacay since I was in high school and stayed in a small cabin without wifi, cell reception or TV. Talk about connecting on a real and deep level. I highly recommend it! Add in my hubby and a total of 5 dogs and see how well you all get along. I am happy to report it was one of the best and most blessed times we’ve ever spent. What made our vacation even more special was that it fell over Father’s Day.
My sis and I are both strong-willed, opinionated women (which we got from our parents) so when we are all together it can cause some head-butting. This vacay was the first time we each let go of ego and resonated in a pure place of love and open hearts. WooHoo! We had several deep & meaningful conversations on topics ranging from marriage, war, Jesus and finances. My sis and I are both cerebral as well as spiritual so we aren’t much for ‘small talk’ and thrive on thought provoking discussions. Can you believe in the midst of those controversial topics – there was NO head-butting? We respected one another’s opinions with total acceptance. What a beautiful thing! Better late than never, right?
Family can be the most challenging and testing of all our relationships and mine has had it’s share of blaming, misunderstanding and some verbal abuse. I used to be first in line to blame all my issues on my parents especially my ‘daddy issues’. You give your parents so much freedom within the forgiveness when you release them from that burden. When I took responsibility for my issues and began appreciating my parents for ALL the things they did right – everything shifted in our relationship.
Is there a family member or relationship you need to set free from the blame game? Do you struggle with forgiveness?
Webster’s definition of forgiveness: to stop feeling anger toward (someone who has done something wrong) ; to stop blaming (someone) ; to cease to feel resentment against (an offender).
Forgiveness is really a gift you give yourself.
Turn off your mind.
Eat nacho cheese Doritos.
Listen to the trees rustle.
Dissect & discuss your favorite books.
No makeup. No fixing the hair.
Watch the rabbits & squirrels play.
I did all these things on vacation with my sister and feel renewed.
Seek out moments like this all Summer Sistas!