WHATCHA SAYING TO YOURSELF? 3 Simple Steps To Positive Self Talk

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Hello Gorgeous!

That simple but powerful statement is today’s topic. A few days ago, I was sitting staring at this coffee cup and thinking how much I love to say this to my friends and I even open most of my SOS webisodes with it. I started wondering how many women actually say that to themselves.  I would bet it’s probably a terribly low percentile of about 10% and that’s on the high range.Think about it.

Do you ever look in the mirror and tell yourself you are gorgeous?

I admit, on most days I look in the mirror and focus on the sagging skin, circles under my eyes, that varicose vein that’s popping out on my leg and the list goes on. Sad this is how we start the day! That’s why I harp on positive affirmations so much. Our mental chatter goes on alllllllllllll day long! We are literally talking to ourselves all day every day. I’m not just referring to how we talk about our physical appearance either. We are either beating ourselves up for the past, feeling guilty about something we did today or have anxiety about the future. This is enough to keep you in a negative spiral 24/7. Who wants to live in freedom from the prison of your mind? ME! My hand is raised and this is what I try to practice every single day. Our minds are powerful and some days are harder than others. If we allow ourselves to spiral too long, we end up in a dark place that’s tough to get out of. I know! I battled depression for many years while I was hiding my secrets and self medicated with drugs. We all deserve to live in freedom. So, it’s up to us to change how we speak to ourselves. No one can do it for us.

Here are 3 simple steps I have found to stay above the dark zone: 

STEP 1: Acknowledgement. We have to take ownership and acknowledge that we’re thinking and saying negative things to ourselves.

STEP 2: Stop that crap. Don’t allow yourself to wallow and play that negative CD over and over in your head. Acknowledge it then stop the thought.

STEP 3: Replace. Once you stop yourself and that crappy thought you must immediately replace it with a positive one. I’ll give you an example of something I thought this morning. “I’m so lazy and feel chunky because I haven’t worked out in a week”… then replaced it with “Hey, I’m not lazy and have been working out hard all year and deserve a break for a few weeks. I’ll get back on the program next week. Enjoy some vacay time Tiff”. It’s all about seeing the positives instead of always focusing on the negatives. See how I turned a “beat myself up” thought into a positive one along with a praise for how hard I’ve worked out all year. We would say the same thing to our best friend. We extend grace to those we love all the time so why is it so difficult to give it to ourselves?

We can talk ourselves out of anything which will stall our goals and dreams. Positive self talk can change the entire direction of our life! This is why I’m a firm believer in using affirmations as a tool to stay on track. I have positive sayings, verses and quotes hanging all over my house.

If you are new to SOS and have not received my affirmations e-book, go to www.TiffanyHendra.com and join the mailing list. The book will come to your inbox for FREE! It’s a compilation for 101 of my favorite affirmations from my Sunday evening blog posts.

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GUESS WHAT?

I’m excited we are back in the sanctuary taping new videos!!! WooHoo!

Any topic you want to see? Comment and let me know. 

Love, Tiff

How to Start 2015 with More Confidence by Guest Blogger Tina Hamilton

ConfidentWoman

There are a lot of excitements and pressures that women feel at the beginning of a new year. Every woman feels the need to instantly dump bad habits, make a lot of New Year’s Resolutions and suddenly be a different person once that clock strives twelve. Of course, this is just not realistic. Goal setting is a great idea to help any woman achieve her dreams, but no one can change completely overnight.

One of the most important traits that any woman needs in order to set realistic goals and achieve those goals is confidence. So many women struggle with not feeling like they are important or capable of achieving greater things, but this is not true! Every woman should create the power within herself to make 2015 her best year yet.

Here are some tips to help you gain more confidence in 2015:

Start with positive self-talk

Every woman is guilty of it from time to time. Putting oneself down and saying negative things is simply not productive. Every woman should focus instead on building herself up, not tearing down with negative self-talk. This can be a difficult process for a lot of women, but it is something that everyone should be working on constantly in order to become the best version of themselves.

Create a comfortable and expressive style

It may sound silly, but dressing cute actually does help a woman’s self-esteem. More importantly, the saying ‘dress the part’ still holds true. If a woman wants to be more confident to impress a man, get a promotion at work, or for any other reason, she should dress appropriately to help get to that goal. Women should forget about following trends and wear things that make them feel beautiful and comfortable, investing in t-shirt bra styles and well-fitting items that will last a lifetime.

Move every day

Exercise is an important aspect of staying healthy and happy. People who get regular exercise are not only happier with their lives, but they are also more confident and outgoing. Everyone should make a point to get up and move every single day. This can range from a ten minute walk around the block to a 2 hour sweaty yoga session.

Find a teammate

Women often feel like they have to do everything on their own, and there is no one out there who would be willing to help them even if they asked. This is an unfortunate misunderstanding. Every woman can and should work to find a teammate or partner who can help them feel better about themselves and achieve their goals this year. This can range from a life coach to a good friend.

Try something new

It sounds a little ironic, but it is true that one of the best ways to feel more confident is to do something that one is not confident doing! By getting outside of their comfort zone and trying new things, women can empower themselves and gain the confidence they need to take on any new challenge 2015 has to offer.

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Tina Hamilton Headshot

Tina Hamilton is a journalist, blogger and social media guru. You can usually find her online or walking along one of Southern California’s beaches with her dog, Joey. Look for her on Twitter

Be Your Own Biggest Cheerleader- SHOW SOME SPIRIT! Woohoo!

Hey My Fab Cheerleading Squad!

Was anyone a cheerleader growing up?  I was and one of the things I loved about it the most was the camaraderie and sisterhood among the squad.  We are all building such a great community and sisterhood here and I want to thank you all for being…Give me a Y, Give me an O, Give me a U…what’s that spell? YOU!  Ok, that sounds kind of corny, but it’s the truth.   So, today I want to remind you to affirm (and give yourself a cheer while doing a toe touch- OUCH! The thought of that hurts!) yourself the way you do your BFF!  Today- it is time to stop beating yourself up.  Ya hear me!  I am so guilty of it lately and that’s why I’m sharing this message today:

I appreciate your patience and will have the new SOS dressing room up in no time!   This recent transition my hubby and I went through is a great learning lesson to “let go” and allow yourself to grow, change, embrace the new and be OK with stepping back for a second.  It may piss some people off in your life, but hey- they’ll get over it!   It will allow you to soar to new heights!  Go for it and I will see you on the next webisode very soon!

SPEAKING OF NEW HEIGHTS:  I do have a fabulous spring shoe to share with you (thanks to my gal pal Cortney) by Nine West!  Holy Super Sexy Wedge!

Sharing the love, beauty + inspiration,

Tiff   (sisk-boom-bah)