Tag Archives: Relationships

AIN’T CALLED BEAUTY SLEEP FOR NOTHIN’ || New Video

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Hello Gorgeous,

Curious, how did you sleep last night? I bet half of you are saying you slept great and the other half tossed, turned, had that 3am mind crank and woke up feeling like the wicked witch of the west. Been there. It flat out sucks! Aside from the anxieties of life, hormones also play a role in bad sleep. Around your period, the insomnia kicks in. Then the next phase of life brings all the night sweating. I mean, really, WHAT THE HECK! Can’t a sista get a break? 

Over time, poor sleep will not only make you cranky and give you those deep track marks in the middle of your eyes (thank God for botox), but it weakens your immune system in a big way. Over the past few years, my stress levels were extremely high which made my sleeping patterns craaaarazy.  What do you think happened?  Of course, I was sick most of last year with upper respiratory infections, colds, adrenal fatigue and clogged lymphatic system. I just thought I wasn’t used to the allergies in Texas, but now I realize how my immune system suffered because of the stress and awful sleep.

I wanted this year to be totally different.

Ladies, what we do now will determine how we look and feel in our 60’s. I’m taking charge of my health and seeking out better choices for everything.  I’ve been fairly health conscious over the past 15 years, but WHOA- our bodies change drastically between 25 and 40. Then again at 45 , 50, and so on. It’s vital that we stay diligent and adjust to the constant changes. Stay in tune with your body! Remember when we were younger and could function on little sleep? Now, I need a full 8-9 hours because I know with the tossing and turning I’m probably only getting about 6-7 good hours.

Add an overly busy lifestyle and lots of travel to poor sleeping habits and it’s a recipe for illness. Check out my latest discovery and how I have kept from getting sick after a  months of travel and the stress + sadness of much loss:

 

In addition to daily exercise, vitamins + supplements, turmeric, garlic, more water, ginger, Manuka honey and cutting back on alcohol– make sure to add the dynamic duo TeaMi teas. To give you more incentive, get 15% OFF with discount code HENDRA15 at checkout.

As always, I would love to hear your two-cents so please share a comment.
You and your thoughts are important to me!

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LAST CHANCE! Only a few tickets left for the Polished Fashion Show on Thursday, May 18th at Belk Galleria. This is one of the best events of the year! I’m so excited to walk in the show. GET TICKETS HERE.

If you don’t know about this remarkable organization, I encourage you to check them out. They are a powerful resource for Faith-filled young entrepreneurial women.

http://www.polishedonline.org/aboutus/

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Wings Or The Worm

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 Hey, Hey, Hey!

Are you conscious of your behavior after a phone call or coffee date with a certain friend who brings out your weaknesses instead of your strengths? For example, you chat with a dear friend who is always complaining and venting her drama- complete with a few curse words for punctuation- and the rest of the day you are whining, focusing on your burdens instead of your blessings and cursing like a sailor. Trust me, I am no Miss Priss and have a fiery personality so a few curse words may fly out of my mouth when I get heated. Not proud of it- just keepin’ it real. As I always say- I’m a work in progress! My point is how interesting we are as humans to emulate and model those we hang around. We may be Spiritually-conscious and awake with our shelves filled with self-help books, but it is easy to get sucked in to the chicken coop instead of rising above and soaring like the eagle that we are.  

I love listening to T.D. Jakes during my power walks and a few days ago he said one simple phrase that struck a chord in me. He said, “Are you associating with people who bring out the wings in you or the worm in you?” Obviously, he’s referring to the beautiful idea of transformation through the butterfly. I posted this on Facebook, but wanted to elaborate and start the discussion here on the blog. We are always in a state of growth and transformation- at least I hope we are! I realize you have joined this community because you place your personal growth, development and empowerment as a priority. As an ‘instigator of change and an ‘agent of transformation’, I thrive on constant growth. The minute I feel stagnant in any area of my life- I’ve got to switch things up, change the behavior and expand a bit. 

We can always be a little bit better today than we were yesterday and I will keep that philosophy until I’m 85.

A vital aspect of our growth is who we surround ourselves with.  Are you associating with those who challenge you to come up higher & encourage you to fly?  A few of my girlfriends are gifted encouragers. They have the ability to hone in on someone’s strengths and lift that person up by pointing out and vocalizing these positive traits. They bring out the wings in that person! Don’t you love being around people like that?!  Often times, we are able to reveal a strength in someone that they didn’t even realize they had. By doing so, we open that person up to their full potential which puts them in a position to fly.

On the other hand, we must be mindful of those who try to bring out the worm in us. You know that friend that likes to include you when she’s talking about her own short comings. She says things like, “We have a hard time losing weight because WE are just lazy”. Then you start questioning yourself, “Am I fat? She’s right- I am lazy”. {Record Scratch} Counteract it by kindly not accepting those negative words over your life and respond with something like, “I’m happy with my weight and work out 4-5 times a week. ‘Lazy’ is not a title I care to wear, thank you”. Of course, then there’s the family member who tries to make you feel bad that you are a ‘driven dreamer’ who appreciates nice things. Misery loves company. It takes all kinds to make the world go round and we can love them and learn from them, but we can also limit our exposure to them. When you’re around the critical ones, stand firm in your beliefs and positivity.

Make sure you are rubbing off on them and not the other way around.   

ACTION STEP: Take a look around you. Who do you spend the most time with? Wing peeps or worm peeps? Make a conscious effort to spend more time with friends who are positive and living a life of excellence & purpose! Those who speak about life with enthusiasm. We all have a Destiny to fulfill so it’s crucial to associate with those who help you come up higher and stay on your path- and vice versa. 

We become like those we hang around. Surround yourself with those who like to soar. Be the wind beneath each other’s wings! 

As always, I love to hear your thoughts.

Comment, Tweet + Share the SOS love!

Love, Tiff

 

P.S. Don’t forget about the fun Summer Kickoff Giveaway happening! Details on the 7 Summer Drugstore Steals post. Ends June 6th. Win a few products below OR a Target gift card plus the new Aaron Hendra Project CD & T-shirt. 

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CHARACTER Above CHARISMA (and a little dating advice)

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Hey Sassy Pants!

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I was pondering this topic lately and decided to write about it.  Charisma can initially attract us to a person, right?   Marianne Williamson says “Charisma is a sparkle in people that money can’t buy.  It’s an invisible energy with visible effects.”   Webster defines it as a special magnetic charm or appeal.  Charisma is a unique quality that we often call the “it” factor or good energy or charm.  Because I live in a city saturated with actors, dreamers and seekers, many times you don’t know if you are encountering the “real” person or not.  People “turn it on” in order to land the audition, sell the pitch or to put it simply– get people to like them.  I know we all have to turn on the charm in certain situations and no matter what industry you’re in, charisma really does play a major role.   But, no amount of skills, talent, or charisma can sustain us the way attitude, integrity, and character does!

OK, TIFF… GET TO THE POINT! 

Let’s forget about the business aspect here.  Let me be clear– I’m not bashing charisma at all.  I wanted to share my thoughts on this for you single gals.

I admit I went out with several guys that sucked me in by their charm, wit, and charisma.  Then I quickly (well, some took months) found out they did not have the CHARACTER to back it up. **Oh the days of being young and naive**  But, I married the strong quiet type, thank God.  My husband didn’t try to charm me or sell himself.  His character and integrity spoke volumes right from the start.  That goes WAY beyond the charm and blinding charisma in my book.  You know those salesmen type guys… Aaachooo- I’m totally allergic to those types now.

So gorgeous, if you are dating– I just want to remind you to always look deeper than the surface sparkle and charisma.  Take the time to really get to know a guy before you throw it all down the drain (you know what I’m sayin’ sista?) and your head is spinning followed by a devastated heart.  Unfortunately, many people do not reveal their true nature until you are completely head-over-heels.  UGH- don’t you hate it when that happens?  You feel duped and blindsided.  The same can apply to friends as well.  Women can be so charming and sweet on the surface,  but then you find out they’re gossiping behind your back or  you can’t trust them as far as you can throw them or they have an agenda other than truly being a real friend.  Let’s save that discussion for another blog post.

If you are dating and hope to be be married to the man of your dreams one day, allow me to offer you this advice:

1) Start praying for your husband.   He’s out there somewhere living his life and probably wondering where you are too.  Pray for him to be blessed, safe, happy and healthy.  Also, ask God to be part of your dating life.  He really is the Ultimate Divine Connector. 

2) Write down a list of every single quality you want in a man.  It may seem silly at first, but I ended up writing an entire spiral notebook about it.  I’m not saying make a list like “No back hair!”  Dig deeper and think about if  you want him to be a hands-on father, the spiritual leader of your family, a great communicator, emotionally sensitive, etc. 

3) Work on your personal growth while you’re waiting for your knight to come sweep you off your feet.  Be as whole as you can be before you get married.  Many women think, “Oh, I’ll be happy when I’m finally married”– No darling, you should be happy with yourself and your life before you meet ‘the one’.  Two whole people have a much better chance at a successful marriage than two lost, insecure, unconscious people.  If you have followed my blog for a while, you know I openly discuss me being ‘one hot mess’ when I was younger.  I still had a lot of issues to work out, but I was well on my spiritual path, turned my life back to God, and was single for nearly two years before I got married.  You may think two years wasn’t very long, but I was a ‘relationship girl’ and often overlapped them.  You know what I’m talking about– you find the next one before you leave the last one.  Just keepin’ it real! 

The most important thing to remember is to always treat, respect and think of yourself like a QUEEN and you will attract your KING!

What are your thoughts on charisma VS. character?  Are you excited to meet your king?  Do you have any dating or marriage questions for me?

I would love to hear your comments + thoughts.

Love, Tiff