4 Little Innocuous (but revolutionary) Phrases by Guest Blogger Natalie Bolton

 

4 agreements

Scientists have done studies on “happiness” and why some people seem to grasp it and why it eludes others. MINDSETS are one of the possible factors that will determine the quality you are able to see reflected in your life. And let me say, I am no perfect master at this, however, it I can just set an intention or two for the day it does help.

Take the book The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz, if one decided to challenge their everyday life with just one of these agreements a day this could totally shift the baseline of the mind, just by focusing on one.

These four little innocuous phrases can be revolutionary!

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BE IMPECCABLE WITH YOUR WORD. (I may just take this one on everyday for an entire month)

If I can make the promise to myself to be impeccable with my word that means that I believe that what I say means something and impacts my life and others. If I just say “YES” to everything and over schedule myself then I end up flaking out of something and letting someone down. So my “yes” should be solid, strong, and valuable. And if I’m putting my word behind it-I need to pay close attention to what I am signing off on in my life. People are affected by my loose over scheduling, over committing, and under delivering (one of my life challenges).

DON’T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY.

I am uber sensitive. I have pinned it on being creative, artistic, a Capricorn, and moody. Blah blah blah…whatever. I have been sensitive in my life because I have taken things personally. What is so amazing in this life is that no one is ever really doing anything on account of anyone else. Honestly, we are so self-consumed that when someone hurts our feelings 9 times out of 10 the hurter of the feelings was completely unaware and in their own world. When someone “consciously” seemed to personally hit you where it hurts it is due to his or her own fear- his or her own perception, and his or her own battle that they are fighting. When I can remember this I am no longer at the affect of someone else. Yah, we all act out sometimes but if we can pause and think that maybe just maybe that person’s issue has zero to do with us it allows us to continue to buzz throughout our life. Then we are able to put our efforts into things that truly matter.

DON’T MAKE ASSUMPTIONS.

There have been times more often than not, sadly, where I have written an Oscar-worthy drama of “Gone with the Wind” proportions that actually in reality never even happened. Now, don’t judge me and say ”Oh, hmmm, did she just admit that she hears voices in her head…hmmm? Did she just announce her crazy to the world?” NO. What I am saying is I think we all at some point have created storied to back up our colorful imaginations. For example, someone doesn’t pick up his beautiful Great Dane’s poop from your yard turns into “Why does so-and-so hate me?” Or a teenager cackles you from across the street turns into “Oh my god! My cool factor has expired and I am officially old.” Or your partner forgetting the dinner at 8 date turns into “He doesn’t love me and he never did love me!” I know I am NOT the only one so reader don’t squint your eyes and poke fun-we all have done it (hormonal fluctuations could be the culprit most times). Nevertheless, we all have had these ridiculous conversations with ourselves. If I can make the choice to NOT assume, I can show up in the world as an adult and ask real questions to get the real answers. Such as, “hey, poop perpetrator, I have a stash of bags here in case anyone walking their dog needs one in a pinch. Have I told you before that they were here?” Poop perpetrator replies, “Oh man, good to know, the other day we totally left a present in your yard because I forgot the bag and also locked myself out of my house resulting in being late for work and forgetting to come back and pick it up. That is what these flowers picked from my garden are for. My sincerest apologies.” The teenager scenario is simply a teenager scenario. And the forgetting of the date drama? Maybe a question such as “So, by you forgetting about our dinner plans is a simple glitch resulting from you being overworked and overscheduled?” And that gives your partner the opportunity to express his or her love for you and how they were actually getting so involved in planning a surprise weekend get-a-way that they simply forgot about the dinner at hand. Problems solved with simple real questions.

ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST.

What does “The Best” scale look like? Well, it is different everyday and moment by moment. One minute I can extend love to a complete stranger on a plane by listening to her heart for the entire 3-hour flight, and the very next moment I can get annoyed and react to the person kicking the back of my seat. Our best is continually changing but if we are striving to always keep our best forefront in our minds we can avoid the all too common abusive self-talk and regret we love to punish ourselves with. You may be able to run the LA marathon after training at your best, but when you are laid out sick from the flu just getting up from the couch to go to the bathroom is your absolute best. Be kind to yourself and always keep your “BEST” as the goal.

 

Fall can be our best season yet. It can be a time of restoration on many levels.  And our mindset can be the solution to problems we have been unable to fix until now.

Small tweaks powerful impact.

 Thrive on,

 Natalie.

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In Natalie’s own words she shares her personal philosophy, “The mandate for my life is not only bringing beauty to people by external means with new technologies, and cutting-edge technique, my goal is to also refresh the spirit. I pray every morning to bring beauty to the spirit of everyone I touch-so they leave feeling more beautiful and at peace after they leave me. I want to live my life like that as well. I want to leave the world more beautiful than when I found it.”

From CBS’s SURVIVOR to skincare, my sister Natalie Bolton has landed at VANITY LOUNGE in Houston, TX. (Yay, do you know how happy our mom is to have both her girls back in the Great State!!)  Having the opportunity to fulfill her desire to bring beauty, healing and a sense of well being to men and women alike, Natalie has found her calling. As a state-board licensed aesthetician and certified Epicuren specialist, Natalie enhances the appearance and condition of her clients’ skin and their sense of self. Her specialties include rejuvenation and anti-aging. Natalie is also an expert in the areas of acne and problematic skin.

To book your appointment with Nat, call 713-942-9177 or book online.   Vanity Lounge is located at 2800 Kirby Drive #B110
Houston, TX 77098 in the Tootsies shopping center across from Eddie V’s. 

 

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NO! Two Little Letters…..So Much Power (Plus Part 2)

Hi Powerful Peacocks!

You ready to get your fill of Beauty, Style + Inspiration?  This blog post is busting at the seams with it!  You may want to grab a pen and paper.  Kick back and let the fun begin…

Not being able to SAY NO is a topic that comes up often among us gals. If you don’t have an issue with it- kudos girlfriend!  It is definitely something that took me a while to get a handle on and still find it to be a challenge.  Grrrr- this tiny little word with those two little letters can have such a kung fu grip on us.  We all have so many commitments these days between our families and their commitments, friends, career demands, church, community plus all the extra-curricular activities like small group meetings, team sports, etc.  WHEW!  I’m worn out just writing all that. Women tend to be “people pleasers” and do not want to let anyone down by not agreeing to help with a task, do a favor or attend an event.  It is just a fact that you cannot be productive if you over-commit yourself! By spreading yourself too thin, you will end up jeopardizing your important priorities and ultimately your health and stress level.   Take the pressure off yourself and start saying “NO” politely and with love.  Here’s 5 tips to help you get started:

  1. YOUR TIME IS PRECIOUS!  Start valuing it by dedicating your time to your priorities. If you don’t have your priorities straight, then start there first!
  2. PRACTICE SAYING “NO”!  Like everything in life, we must practice, practice, practice. Eventually you will be comfortable saying it. I promise.
  3. BE UNAPOLOGETIC! It is important to be polite, but it’s okay to be firm when you are protecting your time.
  4. TAKE A BEAT!  It is totally acceptable to say, “let me get back to you” or “maybe later”.  If it’s a situation that sounds interesting, but you simply do not have the time for it right now- maybe you can rearrange your schedule or fit it in when you have some free time later.
  5. LET GO OF THE GUILT!  Stand your ground and respect your decision for saying no.   We tend to feel guilty later, but that serves no purpose. Let it go, you made your mind up and move on.

Do you find saying “NO” difficult?  Have you overcome it?  Please leave a comment!

HERE’S PART 2 OF KILL THAT SUMMERTIME SHINE:

A few of you have already picked up the Physicians Formula SPF 50 and said you love it! Woohoo!

STYLE TIP FOR THE WEEK:

One of the reasons I love summer so much is that we’re able to rock fun exotic prints that have an international flare plus tropical florals, great woven bags and bright jewelry like that great turquoise piece you picked up in Mexico!  I’ll be chatting more about this in an upcoming webisode on MY SUMMER ESSENTIALS.  A great Tribal or Navajo print is definitely a MUST ROCK!  I’m drooling over this BCBG dress that just came out:

A BIT OF DESSERT WITH A CHERRY ON TOP:

I was asked for my recommendations on books I found helpful along my path of Spiritual growth and healing.  There are so many more that this list, but here is a list of books I highly recommend:

  1. The Bible. The best “self help” book ever.
  2. Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill.  I like to read this once a year!  It’s not just about financial riches.
  3. The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide To Personal Freedom by Miguel Ruiz.  4 simple but profound things to apply to our lives to bring peace, grace and unconditional love.
  4. The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. Learning to live fully present. Another one I re-read yearly.
  5. Battlefield of the Mind by Joyce Meyer.  The most brilliant guide to overcoming negative thinking and depression.
  6. As A Man Thinketh by James Allen. I actually keep this on my nightstand 24/7. It’s all about your thoughts relating to your circumstances.
  7. The Power of Intention by Dr. Wayne Dyer. Encourages determination and a never-give-up attitude.
  8. Your Best Life Now by Joel Osteen. Steps to living your full potential.
  9. Sacred Contracts: Awakening Your Divine Potential  by Carolyn Myss. Discovering your life purpose.
  10. The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron.  Helps unlock creativity and the Spiritual connection to it.

A few other’s that just popped in my head that I just cannot leave out are A Course In Miracles,  A Return To Love by Marianne Williamson and The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey.

Do you have a ‘must read’ book that was life-altering for you? Please share!


‎*Oolala* SOS is so International!

Welcome aboard you fabulous new sistas from Canada to the UK to Cairo, Egypt to Lithuania to the Philippines and to my hubby’s homeland of Australia! 

PLEASE COMMENT ON THE FB PAGE + TELL US WHERE YOU ARE FROM! https://www.facebook.com/sanctuaryofstyle

I will be randomly choosing a winner to send a few of my fave “shine free” products to at the end of the month!

Stand Tall + Shake Your Tail-feathers,

Tiff